As of late, Joseph Campbell, renowned scholar of myth and mythology, has been somewhat of a guru in my own life journey (many thanks to Tom Beaudoin, another of my beloved teachers, for sending me his way). I have been reading a book, called The Power of Myth, in which Campbell and Bill Moyers discuss mythological themes across time and space, major archetypes common to nearly all of human experience. This morning, I finished a section in which they discussed possible mythological interpretations of the theme of a virgin birth. Campbell specifically discusses virgin birth as it relates to Jesus of Nazareth and the Buddha, two of the most monumental spiritual leaders in history of mankind. In the case of Jesus, he is said to be born of Mary, a virgin, by the power of the Spirit (important). The Buddha, on the other hand, is said to have been born out of his mother's side, emerging from the place of her heart chakra. This heart chakra, Campbell says, represents the first truly human impulse, as opposed to the first three "animalistic" chakras (nourishment, procreation, aggression) - that of compassion.
Both the virgin birth and the heart chakra birth signify a movement by humans away from strictly animalistic experience and desires. Campbell says, "Here you move out of the field of animal action and into a field that is properly human and spiritual... it [the virgin birth] is the birth of spiritual man out of the animal man."
What is it about the spiritual/human person that differs from the animal person? "It happens when you awaken at the level of the heart to compassion, com-passion, shared suffering: experienced participation in the suffering of another person. That's the beginning of humanity."
These births signify the (from what we know), strictly human experience of compassion. Broken down, the etymology of the word is com, or together, and passion, to suffer. It is both a realization of the shared suffering and experience of all humankind, as well as the attempt to enter into the suffering and experience of another.
Now, besides the fact that I am a huge theology/philosophy nerd and am obsessed with human experience and how to piece all these major questions together, why am I writing about this?
On the train ride home from Manhattan yesterday, I had an experience that I would like to reflect on through this lens of compassion. I was sitting in the handicap section of a LIRR train car, greedily eating my lamb over rice. After a long day of exploring, life discussion, and beer with my cousin, I was blistered and sore and very ready to eat. Across from me was a young mother with her daughter.
The daughter was maybe only 6 or 7, very cute, full of energy and funny faces. The mother was tired looking, and seemingly not in the mood for much of anything. Nearly the entirety of the hour long ride we shared together, the mother spent fiddling around on her phone. The daughter, on the other hand, continued to talk to her, make faces at her, dance around in the seat, make annoying noises, and generally seek to get attention. I thought the girl was so funny and adorable - mom on the other hand, only pried her eyes away from the phone to chastise her daughter, threatening to smack her if she didn't stop acting up.
In my mind, it was clear - she just wants attention! Take your head out of your ass and give your kid some attention! There was immediately and association, and identification on my part with the little girls situation. I understood (on some level) why she was seeking attention, why even the negative attention was better than nothing.
But, this morning, I realized, that isn't compassion. Identifying with someone is the easy part. Those are the people whom it is easy to show compassion toward, because we are already disposition to do so.
After reading Campbell this morning, I had to wonder - what about the mother? The act of compassion has to have some measure of intentionality. Not only is it easy for me to identify with daughter (as a son, and recent young person myself), but it also reflects my bias. I can't identify particularly with the trials of a mother, big or small, because I have not been in that position before.
I started asking myself, why is it that she looked so annoyed? Long day of work making not enough money? Visiting parents or in-laws that were draining? Just the daily weariness that comes with the trials of traveling with a young child? What was she doing on her phone? Facebook? Paying bills? Talking to someone else she was having her own problems with?
I'll never know any of the answers to those questions, but I think that's the point. I can't make some kind of final judgement on this woman. How the hell could I? I have literally no idea what is going on in her life, what the story is that influences her actions. Compassion isn't about necessarily making a decision, or forming an opinion, or justifying a judgement. It is about suffering together - with both daughter, and mother.
It is this both/and mindset that I am trying to take out with me into my experience on the Rosebud Reservation (9 days!!). Both/and is a way towards compassion for as many people as possible because I think it will leave the heart open to experience, whatever that may be.
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