Lent is probably one of my favorite times in the year. Sick? Maybe! But for those of you who know me a little, especially about my spiritual life, it shouldn't come as too much of a surprise. I am all about a challenge - mine is a God who loves to mess with me. Lent is intentional for me, a time to really choose where I want to put my time and energy, to practice in my spiritual life so I can make myself more open to spiritual growth.
My roommate, Mike, has got me working out this year, lifting weights and eating healthier. It has been an important part of my experience here. I am a very physical person - with so much energy, it has always been important for me to give that a positive physical outlet. For the last couple of years, however, I have really neglected this part of my health - I ate like crap and did not do nearly enough exercise to balance the negative effects of that. I am working hard on my physical health, and after some reflection, I thought that my health journey was more than just physical, but spiritual and emotional as well. It is holistic.
At first, I thought that I could theme my lent on the idea of "Trim the Fat." I still got a little belly that I wouldn't mind cutting down, and I thought this would be a perfect overall theme. Part of the JVC experience is a commitment to living simply, so I had started thinking of what other areas of "fat" in my life are. Trying to cut down on the amount of stuff I have, to get down to basics and what is necessary for me.
But. That doesn't really seem to be what I am called to. For all you lovers of steak out there - (despite new understanding of how awful meat production is in our country, I have to admit, that doesn't mean good meat tastes any less amazing to me) - if you know about steak, you know you want to get a good with good marbling in it. This means you want a piece of meat with good lines of fat running through it, for these are what are going to lend your meat tremendous amounts of flavor when you cook it. Thinking further, I realized how essential fat is to so many animals - a layer of fat is what helps them to survive, to stay warm, etc.
Maybe what I was trying to say was not just "trim the fat," but rather, "Trim the Excess." What are the fat parts of my life anyway - the parts that make it taste GREAT. Playing music with my friends? Watching a movie with people I care about, or playing a board game? Laying out in the sun in the middle of a long hike, just enjoying the life and beauty around me? Now that I think of it, fat is alright! It gives my life some beautiful flavor, some warmth.
It's excess that I am trying to trim down on. Excessive fat, sure - too much use of the amazing technology available to me and I start to become less present to the moment and people right in front of me - I start to convince myself I have no need that cannot immediately be satisfied, no desire that can't be fulfilled. Too much music and I get no work done. But too much of other things too! Too much work and stress, and I am not enjoying any of the things God put here for exactly that purposes - joy! Too much emphasis on healthy eating and living, and I become obsessive and one track in my thinking. Plus, shit, I still love a good milkshake!
I think this Lent for me is about shaving down all the things I do in excess, and that requires constant attention and reflection and vigilance. It forces me to ask questions in all areas of my life and see how I can best strike a balance. Too much here, not enough there, lacking here, saturated there. It is about learning how to be aware of my flow, and be flexible enough to adjust with my needs. So, to do that, I will practice being more disciplined, not for the sake of being disciplined, but so that I am able to till my soil, work my land, and leave myself more and more open for when those life-changing moments occur. Get myself ready to accept the things that are going to help me grow.
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